Parenting by Heart
How to stay connected to your child in a disconnected world
|Available at Amazon.com
and Barnes and Noble
This book is about breaking myths. Today’s parents are overwhelmed, not just by the stresses of running a household, but by the insidious expectations that somehow it’s all supposed to be different, that parents are supposed to be “wise” and “in-charge,” and that families are supposed to find harmony and togetherness through lovely ideas like “quality time.”
In this book, I give a reassuring alternative to all those notions of perfection that leave real moms and dads feeling incompetent, self-conscious, and insecure. I shift our attention from perfection back to our natural instinct to connect, and I show in step-by-step fashion how the connections formed early on, can see us through from day-care to dating.
Most important, by addressing the myths of child-rearing, parents can break out of ineffective and even destructive “dances,” those repetitive interactions that undermine our love and best intentions. Areas covered are:
The Myth of “Between You and Your Child:” How the family dance comes between you and your child – and how to break destructive ones.
The Myth of “Sensitivity”: How to help your child open up without turning yourself into a therapist.
The Myth of “Consistency”: Why no discipline technique works for more than three days and what you can do about it.
The Myth of the “Fair Parent”: How to use bribery, threats and other “dirty” tricks to help your child become a better person.
“A sensitive, insightful, and refreshing book. Intelligently challenges worn-out ideas and advice that parents have been given in that vast ocean of guides and manuals. I recommend this book for all parents.”
– Lee Salk, Ph.D.
“Parenting by Heart gives excellent practical advice on parenting. It’s one of the best books on parenting that I’ve read in a long time!”
– Alvin F. Poussaint, M.D. Harvard Medical School
“Parenting by Heart is a guidebook with heart – and a barrelful of common sense. Ron Taffel takes readers through the most bewildering contradictions of everyday child-rearing: how to balance love with discipline, expectations with empathy, security with separation, and parental protectiveness with preparation for life. His provocative thoughts on guilt, bribery, networking, rewards, parent-blaming, and spirituality are in themselves worth the cover price.”
– Letty Cottin Pogrebin, author of “Growing-Up Free” and “Family Politics”